Year In Review...(Part 2)

I guess before I get too depressed about being in the same place as I was last year at this time, I should probably really think about it. Has anything really changed from last year? I would love to list all sorts of ways I have improved my own life, or shoot...even others. Wouldn't that be an encouragement? It would be great if I had a bunch of positive things I had done to look back on. But I don't think I will ever be able to look back on a year and NOT wish I had been a better Mom, wife, friend. I always know that I can do better.

So...nope. I can't really say I did anything too outstanding over the last year that would be worthy of bragging about in my little, rarely read blog!

Now. If you want to talk about events. Milestones. Defining moments. 2009 was full of them! We'll talk about the hardest stuff first.

2009 was a year of losing loved ones for us. Not only did we lose a special Aunt that I dearly loved and my sweet Grandpa, we also lost a great friend to cancer. It was Funerals in the Fall for me. Again. I don't know why I always lose people I love in the Fall. We lost BOTH of our babies in the Fall. My nephew, Russ, was killed in a car accident in the Fall. And then this last Fall. My Aunt, Grandpa, and our good friend, Scott. When I think of the season of Fall, I immediately think of Ecclesiastes 3. "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven; a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot..." Fall '09 was a difficult SEASON for us.

It's honestly hard to even think about anything else that happened in '09. I guess I should mention that right, smack, dab in the middle of ALL of that (all three loved ones passed away within a few weeks of each other) I went back to work. Full time. I had not worked full time in 8 years. And of course this opportunity came up RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE of all of it. The timing couldn't have been worse.

We also purchased a rental house this year. It was in desperate need of repairs before renting it out, so our Spring last year was spent working on that. I think I could blog for days on that experience. Stressful. Rewarding. Exhausting.

Drew started Kindergarten. Got glasses. Indira grew taller. And sweeter. And moodier. And prettier. And mouthier. Drew learned to lie to make a story sound a little more interesting. (Nipped that in the bud.) Indira learned about fractions. Drew learned to read. And they both still argue to ride the bus to school when I am going to the exact same place to work as the Secretary! The more things change, the more they stay the same, I guess.

It was a year. Full of ups and downs. Went by WAY to quickly. I guess I should start thinking of my goals for '10. Lose weight? Always. Be more organized? Wonder how many times that has made it to the list of resolutions. Let's not forget...be a better Mom, wife, friend....I could go on and on!

Year In Review...(Part 1)

Well, I lied a little when I started my blog. I said that I would be blogging about Faith, Family or my fight with Fat and even promised to have one of the three subjects in the title. I guess you just let this whole blogging thing evolve and do what works.

I am tempted to change the name of my blog, since I have often veered from said topics, but really...everything I talk about probably fits into one of those somehow. The only big thing that has changed has been my desire to discuss different views when it comes to faith. I guess that happened once or twice. But I don't think people like to talk about their faith. I mean, they do if you aren't challenging them on why they believe what they believe. But if you even THINK about questioning anything you have been taught at church, most Christians run the other direction. I am a little annoyed by that. I mean, I am truly not TRYING to make someone change their mind. I am trying to understand. I question because I want to learn. I challenge because I want to think for myself and not be led BLINDLY like so many are. I think people are just offended when they think you are challenging them. It was NEVER meant to offend. I did appreciate the one person who chose to participate in one conversation...I was pleasantly surprised at how open I was to his opinion.

But I digress. I thought a blog would be a great forum for me to gain some insight. Didn't turn out to be. It actually ended up being some strange form of therapy for me, which I have stated in the past, has proven to be loads cheaper than retail therapy. So I'll take it.

About FAMILY, I did enjoy sharing a few stories this year about my crazy kids and silly husband. I never cease to be amazed at how you can get so frustrated with folks you love so deeply. I didn't even think I was capable of loving like this. Yet, often I am pushed to the point of total insanity by the very same individuals. Screwy.

My fight with fat. Oh...well...crap. I didn't just lose. I was knocked out in the first round. I don't know what the heck happened. I really thought that if I blogged about it, I would have some sort of accountability. In turn, I would surely celebrate success. Not so much. In fact, I gained weight this year. Had I only actually started losing when my blog began, I would be at goal weight by now.

Coulda-Woulda-Shoulda.

I know better than to go down that road. I can guilt myself into a deep depression faster than you can say FAT GIRL. I can't go there. Only forward.

So. Here we are. Entering 2010. Still on my journey with God. (Grateful every day for that relationship.) Still learning how to be a parent. (I suppose I will have that figured out by the time they graduate.) And still fat. (Unfortunately.)

What HAS changed?